Growing up, one thing my dad would always remind my brother and I was that we could do anything we wanted to, as long as we didn’t hurt anybody else. That’s always stuck with me because sometimes I need a reminder that my actions could hurt someone else and I need to think of another way to do them without hurting anyone. The one person I tend to hurt the most without meaning to is myself. We all tend to put ourselves last when we sometimes need to put ourselves first.

We have always been taught to not be selfish and to help other people as much as possible, which is great advice to live by. What we were never taught was how to take care of ourselves.

My first tip is listen to your body. When something is stressing me out, I tend to get sick a lot. But I just push through it until it gets so bad I have to go to a doctor. If I were to listen to my body when I start to not feel well and rest a bit, I wouldn’t get sick.

I’ve had days where I have been so bored I wish I had something to do. I’ve also had months where I was so busy I wish I had time to be bored.

Even now, my weekends are all booked up until the end of July. I have a lot of friends and family with birthdays this month and I know how it feels to not have them here on my birthday so I don’t want to disappoint them by not showing up to theirs. But at the end of the day, it’s OK to say no.

Here’s my next tip — it’s OK to say no. Saying no is kind of a taboo thing I’ve noticed. The word no is so ugly. People are put off when they ask for a favor and you say no. But it is okay to say no, if it means you are taking care of your wellbeing. People will get over it. It’s okay to say no when someone asks to hangout. I have felt judged for saying no to an outing just because I wanted to stay home and watch a TV show. I don’t think that’s fair. We shouldn’t make others feel bad for not wanting to hangout with us.

Speaking of people, friends come and go in our lives and I’ve learned to let go of the toxic friends I’ve had along the way. Letting go of friendships is really hard but if all they do is make your life worse, it’s time to let go.

That tip goes for anything in your life, really. If something is not improving your life and just making you feel worse, it’s time to let go of that.

Mental health is something very important subject a lot of people don’t talk about. Admitting you have a problem is the first step to getting better for any hardship in your life, including your mental health.

I’ve had a lot of friends admit they want to see a therapist but they were too embarrassed to go. I think seeing a therapist is a great thing. If your body is hurting, you see a doctor. If your well being is hurting, you see a therapist. It’s what they are there for.

I’ve made make a recent life change that was incredibly hard. I was embarrassed of making the change because of what people were going to think.

It’s OK to not worry about what others think. That was what was stopping me from making the change. I was too worried about what people were going to think and I didn’t have time to explain to everyone my reasoning for the change. When my friends pointed out all of the positives the change was going to bring, it made me feel better. I was way too worried about others instead of my well being.

Any change we make in our lives is very hard. I hate change. I like the way things are in my life and when things change I get shook up and panic.

I have been lucky to be surrounded by good people who understand and listen to me when I make a big life change. I have people like my boyfriend who has seen me make a lot of hard changes and know that all I need sometimes is a day to myself to think about the changes. He reminds me to take care of myself and that I don’t need to do things that make me unhappy just because I’m afraid of what people will think or just to please someone.

Taking care of your body and mental health is something people should do more often. Don’t ignore symptoms or signs your body is giving you.

We have one life. We shouldn’t spend it trying to please others and putting our well being in the backseat.